How to Motivate a Man: The Advice Women Need to Hear

Are you struggling with a husband or a boyfriend who seems to have lost his drive?

We receive countless calls from women asking how to motivate a man who appears stuck, uninspired, or simply not making an effort anymore.

While our female love experts offer wonderful relationship guidance, we decided to go straight to the source for this particular challenge. We asked our male gifted psychics to share their insights on what truly motivates men…and their answers might surprise you.

These are perspectives from men with deep intuitive abilities who understand both the spoken and unspoken needs in relationships.

So, what did our guys reveal about motivating the man in your life?

What Motivates Men the Most?

Most men are motivated by emotional support, a sense of achievement, and the desire to provide for their loved ones. Celebrating their milestones and encouraging them to pursue their own goals will foster growth and keep them motivated.

It isn’t complicated, but women often misunderstand it. Men aren’t motivated by nagging, criticism, or being told what to do. These approaches typically create resistance rather than inspiration, and will prevent you from building a good relationship with a man.

Instead, our male psychics point to these fundamental motivational drivers:

» The desire to lead and make important decisions in areas where they feel competent

» The need for genuine respect and appreciation that acknowledges their positive qualities

» A foundation of trust that allows them to act without constant oversight or questioning

» Support for their vision and the ability to connect today’s work to tomorrow’s achievements

» Space to solve problems and grow in their own way without pressure or excessive direction

Applying these core motivations doesn’t mean you need to change who you are as a woman. It simply allows you to inspire your man in ways that truly resonate with him as a human being.

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Making Your Man Feel Motivated

Now, let’s talk about how to motivate your partner based on the above. We’ll share specific approaches for bringing out the best in your husband or boyfriend. Our colleagues suggest these align with how men naturally process motivation and respond to support from the women in their lives.

Spark His Leadership Without Surrendering Yours

It’s not a secret that men feel motivated when they have opportunities to lead. We aren’t saying you must take a back seat in your relationship. However, creating space for his leadership will strengthen your partnership when done thoughtfully.

Most men respond positively when they sense you trust their judgment in specific areas of life.

Ask his opinion on a decision and genuinely consider his perspective. Acknowledging his ability to think through problems activates his natural desire to step up and lead.

“I see your strengths in this area” can work wonders compared to “Let me show you how to do this.”

When he succeeds in these moments of leadership, you both win. And when things don’t go perfectly, resist the urge to say, “I told you so” – this creates a negative association with taking initiative.

Many women we talk with worry that encouraging male leadership means submitting to outdated gender roles. But our colleagues emphasize that modern men aren’t seeking control…they seek respect for their contributions.

Men love knowing that they bring strengths and values to the relationship.

Motivation flourishes when neither partner feels the need to dominate all decisions. When you give him opportunities to lead in areas where he’s skilled or passionate, you’ll see him become more motivated in other aspects of your shared life.

Become His Biggest Fan (Without Inflating His Ego)

One of the most powerful ways to motivate your man is through genuine appreciation, but there’s a specific art to this that many women miss.

Men respond to recognition in their own ways. They’re starving for authentic acknowledgment of their efforts, not just their achievements.

Some women spent years finding a good man worth holding onto. If you’ve found the right guy, make him feel truly seen and valued.

Please don’t mistake this for empty flattery or constant praise. We’re talking about specific, timely recognition that acts as emotional support and fuels his desire to keep trying and improving.

Here are a few practical ways to do it that he’ll appreciate:

» Notice and comment on his process, not just the end result. “I saw how patient you were figuring out that problem” shows you’re paying attention to his character, not just what he produces.

» Acknowledge the small things he does that often go unnoticed. The trash taken out, the call he made to the insurance company, or the way he listened when you needed to talk.

» Express appreciation in front of others occasionally. A simple “Tom is amazing at negotiating deals” at a gathering can provide motivation that lasts for weeks.

Men won’t tell you how much your recognition matters to them…it’s not in their nature. But our psychics confirm that acknowledgment from their partner is one of the strongest motivational forces in their lives.

The key is authenticity, not manipulating him with praise to get what you want.

Motivate Your Man Through Action, Not Just Words

Guys are more motivated by what they see than what they hear.

This insight from our male psychics reveals why some well-intentioned conversations about motivation don’t result in lasting change. Demonstrating respect through your actions speaks volumes to your partner and inspires him in ways that discussions alone never could.

One of our clients, Melissa, discovered this truth after months of frustration with her husband, Carlos. She shared that despite numerous conversations about her desire for him to be more proactive with their finances, nothing changed.

During one of Melissa’s sessions, our love psychic suggested a different approach.

“Carlos feels criticized rather than trusted,” our colleague explained. “Instead of telling him what needs to change, show him you believe in his abilities.”

Melissa was skeptical but agreed to try. Shortly after, when their car needed replacing, rather than researching options herself as usual, she told him:

“I trust your judgment on this. You understand our budget and what we need.”

And the magic happened, shared Melissa. Carlos spent days researching options, negotiated an excellent deal, and handled all the paperwork. But the real change came afterward. He began tracking their expenses without prompting and even suggested a new savings plan.

Similar patterns appeared in many relationships where women felt frustrated due to unrealistic expectations and asked us for advice.

Instead of putting too much pressure on your man, show trust by not checking up on tasks, redoing his work, or criticizing his approach.

This will naturally motivate him and reinforce more of this positive behavior.

Connect His Daily Efforts to His Bigger Vision

Helping your partner connect his current activities with his longer-term goals can significantly boost his motivation and sense of fulfillment.

Most men have dreams and aspirations they don’t regularly discuss.

These might involve career achievements, personal growth, family legacy, or making an impact in an area they care about, like maintaining happiness in the relationship.

When daily tasks seem disconnected from these deeper desires, motivation can fade and be replaced by a sense of going through the motions.

As his partner, you can try to help him see these connections.

Not creating a vision for him but rather helping him recognize how his current efforts align with the future he wants to build. Your perspective as someone who knows him well can illuminate links he might not see himself.

For example:

If he’s putting extra hours into a stressful job, you can remind him how this work supports the family vacation you’re both excited about or the security it provides for your children.

If he’s learning a new skill that seems frustrating at the moment, point out how it connects to his long-term goal of greater independence or creativity.

This can motivate your man by transforming mundane tasks into meaningful steps toward something that matters to him. One of our psychics emphasizes that this approach is particularly effective because it respects his internal motivation rather than imposing external pressure.

Again, the idea is to focus on his vision, not yours for him.

Listen carefully when he talks about what he hopes to achieve in life. Then, help him make the connection between daily work and deeper purpose.

That’s a source of motivation that can sustain him through challenges and routine responsibilities.

Don’t Direct Your Man’s Growth – Witness It

One of the most counterintuitive insights from our male psychics is that sometimes, the best way to motivate a man is to step back.

Too much direction, even when well-intentioned, often has the opposite effect. It makes him feel that you don’t trust his ability to handle situations on his own.

You may inadvertently send the wrong message when you constantly offer suggestions, solutions, or corrections. This puts pressure on him, leading to resistance rather than inspiration.

Instead, focus on being more feminine. Nurture your relationship by creating a better environment.

Men typically feel most motivated when they sense you have confidence in their capacity to learn and adapt without constant guidance.

Becoming a witness to his growth rather than a director of it requires patience and trust.

Don’t rush to rescue him. Let your man approach challenges in his own way, even when his method differs from yours. Accept that struggles and even failures are valuable parts of his journey.

Lisa, one of our regular clients, shared how this approach transformed her relationship.

When her husband decided to start a small side business, her instinct was to help by creating to-do lists and suggesting efficient processes.

But after a reading with one of our love and relationship experts, she chose instead to express interest and simply ask occasional questions about his progress. Lisa told us:

“It was hard to sit on my hands at first, but watching him figure things out on his own and seeing his pride when he solved problems made me realize my ‘help’ would have robbed him of that satisfaction.”

We don’t mean becoming passive or disinterested in your man’s endeavors.

When we say witnessing, we mean being present, offering encouragement, and showing genuine curiosity about his process…without pushing him out of his way.

Be supportive instead of trying to manage him, and watch his internal motivation flourish when he feels respected as a capable person.

As Dr Prem Jagyasi once said:

“Respect and compassion aren’t about how you feel for someone, they are more about how you make others feel.”

Few More Words

We hope these insights have given you a fresh perspective on motivating the man in your life. Always remember that, like true love in relationships, motivation isn’t something you can force.

It grows naturally when the right conditions are present.

We know very well that every relationship has its own dynamics. If you’re dealing with a partner who seems lost or unmotivated, our gifted psychics can offer deeper insights tailored to your situation.

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In those ten minutes, you might discover exactly what your man needs to feel inspired and engaged again, enabling you both to thrive.

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